Letting Yourself Be Impressed
by imSiriuslyLupin4you
Summary: Remus explains what love is and tells Lily that she needs to let herself be impressed, and Lily has no idea how to do that.   Slight SB/RL and pre-JP/LE. Takes place sixth year. ONESHOT


**I know I'm supposed to be working on my other fic, 'Good Boys Like It Rough', but I lost chapter six and now I have to redo it. *sad face* I hope you enjoy this new fic while you wait! This is based on the song Ex Factor by Lauryn Hill, but it's not a song fic. **

**All things recognizable are owned by Someone Else…. Dammit.**

Remus Lupin and Lily Evens were sitting at a table in the library. They were working on an extremely boring potions essay, discussing the magical properties of moonstones. Rather, Lily Evens was working on an extremely boring potions essay, discussing the magical properties of moonstones, and Remus Lupin was smiling dreamily and doodling 'Moon and Stars forever', with hearts and stars and moons and planets and other mushy girly things on his parchment.

Lily glared at her half done essay and inwardly cringed as Remus gave another happy sigh. She was glad that he was happy, of course. Remus was one of her best friends! But all these happy sighs and secret smiles just had to stop. She wasn't upset that these little signs of love were for a _boy_. Lily wasn't prejudiced. She didn't care that Remus liked boys. But she _did_ care that one of her closest friends had to fall in love with _Black_. _Sirius_ friggin _Black_. Hogwarts most (in)famous womanizer _and_ maninizer. Hogwarts resident bad boy and heartbreaker. The magical version of Danny Zuko, and Remus just _had _to be Sandy.

Lily had already spent countless nights sitting up with friends whose hearts Black had broken. She had already provided a shoulder to cry on, ears to listen, hankies to blow in, advice to give... She didn't want to have to do any of that for Remus too.

He sighed again, and Lily felt her temper flare up. She had it. Lily slammed her book down on the library table, ignoring the nasty look that Madame Pince gave her, and began to beat Remus with a cylinder of rolled up parchment. "Will. You. Stop._ Sighing_? Remus, you know that I love you, but this has gone on long enough!"

"Ow… _Lily…_" Lily ignored the puppy dog eyes that had gotten Remus out of so many detentions. She raised her eyebrow and Remus sighed (though thankfully _this_ time it wasn't for Black) and stopped pouting. "What was that for?"

"You're acting like a twelve year old girl with a massive crush." Lily snapped. "With all the _doodles_ and the sighs and all that other mushy girly stuff… It's nauseating."

Remus blinked. "Oh. Well… what's wrong with that?"

Now it was Lily's turn to blink in surprise. "What did you just say?"

Remus shrugged. "What's wrong with that? Being in love is the best feeling in the world!" Remus smiled softly. "I can't just hold it in… sometimes I just _need_ to doodle and sigh and act like a twelve year old girl with a massive crush, you know?" Lily gave Remus a look that clearly said 'who-are-you-and-what-have-you-done-with-my-best-friend-you-best-friend-impersonator?' Remus saw the look and sighed. "Lily you need to fall in love. Then you'll understand."

"I _do_ understand." Lily snapped. "I understand that 'love' makes you act like a complete moron!" She stood up and loomed over Remus who was still sitting down. "I understand that 'love' is nothing more than a chemical reaction produced by the brain to insure reproduction! _You're_ the one who doesn't understand!"

Remus smiled softly at Lily's outburst. "Lily, I know what love is. Love is more than just a, how did you put it, 'a chemical reaction produced by the brain to insure reproduction'. It's knowing that no matter _what_ I'll care for Sirius, and he'll care for me. I know that when he says he'll be there for me he'll really _be_ _there_ for me, you know? I know that he'll cry for me, and die for me. I know that he'll give anything for us to be together, and best of all he'll _live_ for me."

Lily was struck silent. She had never heard Remus talk so passionately about something before. Not even chocolate. "You really _do_ love Black, don't you?"

Remus smiled and nodded. "I do. And you know what else?"

"What?"

"I think that you should find yourself someone to love too. I think that the next time James makes a fool out of himself in order to impress you; you should let yourself be impressed. He's not bad, really. He just doesn't know how to talk to you." And with that Remus smiled at Lily, and gathered up his books. "I've got to go meet Sirius. He says Hagrid has gotten a new pet and wants to have us over for supper to show it off." Remus grimaced slightly. "Tell James to sneak us some dinner, yeah?" and with one last wave Remus walked off, leaving a very confused Lily.

After a few moments of shocked silence, Lily put her things into her bag and walked to the Great Hall for dinner. She was still lost in thought when she sat between her two best friends Marlene McKinnon and Alice White.

Lily couldn't seem to concentrate on Alice's ramblings about 'that cute Frank boy on the Wizard Chess team'. What Remus had said about her needing love and letting herself be impressed, stayed stubbornly in her mind. '_How can I LET myself be impressed_?' Lily thought angrily. '_Either I AM impressed or I'm NOT_.'

"I'm going to bed." Lily said, interrupting Alice and cutting her rant short. "Tell me if Dumbledore says anything important." Lily pushed away her steak and kidney pie and stalked out of the Great Hall, ignoring both her friend's stunned looks.

Lily was halfway to the Common Room when she bumped into something solid. When she saw who it was her bad mood deepened.

"Watch it, Potter. Christ, I thought glasses were supposed to help people _not_ to bump into things."

"Sorry." Potter kneeled on the floor and started to pick up the things he had dropped after colliding with Lily. "Alright Evens?"

_"No_. I'm _not 'alright'_ Potter." Lilly snapped as Potter stood up. "_Why_ on _earth_ would you think that I was 'alright'? Do I_ look_ 'alright' to you?"

Potter took a step back and held his hands up in defense. "Sorry Evens… I didn't mean to offend you."

Lily glared at Potter. "Just… get out of my way." Lily made to stalk past him, but Potter accidentally stepped in Lily's path and dropped his things again.

"Oh, damn." Potter muttered, and knelt back down. Lily, feeling a bit guilty, started to help. In silence they gathered up Potter's books and papers.

"Why do you carry around all these things, anyway?" Lily found herself asking. "It's really disorganized."

Potter shrugged. "I dunno. Moony says the same thing though."

Lily could see that. Remus practically had OCD when it came to neatness, cleanliness and all things organizational. "Why do you need this?" Lily held up a piece of slightly worn parchment. "It's just a bit of old parchment." Lily made to put it in her pocket. "Here, I'll throw it out for you-"

"NO!" Lily jumped at Potter's outburst and gave him an odd look. Potter cleared his throat. "Er… I mean… I'll throw it out." He held out his hand.

"No, It's no trouble. Really. I can do it." Lily said slowly, and moved the parchment towards her pocket. Potter's eyes grew large and panicked behind his round glasses.

"E-Evens… Lily, please just give me that parchment."

Lily raised her eyebrow. "Is it really that terribly important, Potter?"

Potter flushed. "N-no… It's just a spare bit of parchment…"

"Then it doesn't matter if I tear it then, does it?" Lily made to rip the parchment and Potter made an odd squeaking noise. "Give it back."

"Why should I?" Lily stood up and put her hands on her hips. "It's just a 'spare bit of parchment.' Why should it matter if I throw it out or not? Is it _really_ that sentimental, Potter? Is it _so_ important, this ugly, little, 'spare bit of parchment?' Well, _is it_?"

Potter sat frozen on the floor.

"You know what _I_ think?" Lily took out her wand. "_I_ think that this is _more_ than just a 'spare bit of parchment'. _I_ think that _this,_" Lily waved her wand. "Is _the reason_ that you and your friends _never_ get caught."

Potter blinked.

Lily smirked, and touched her wand to the parchment. "Reveal your secret!"

Nothing happened.

Lily scowled and tapped the parchment again. "Show yourself!"

Again, nothing.

Now Lily was growing angry. "I, Lillian Rose Evens, _command_ you to yield the information you conceal!"

And then, words started to appear on the parchment. Lily glanced at Potter, who looked as if he were about to faint, smugly, and laughed a little to herself. _Finally_! She would know how they were able to do it all!

_Messer Moony happily greets Miss Evens, and complements her on figuring out how to work this, though he does beg her to mind her own business in the future. After all, curiosity killed the cat._

Lily blinked, then scowled. Her and Remus were going to have a looong talk the next time they saw each other.

_Messer Prongs regrettably agrees with Messer Moony, but would like to add that Miss Evens is so beautiful and clever that she would have figured it out anyhow, without killing any cats, perhaps excluding Mrs. Norris._

A small smile flickered over Lily's lips. Potter thought that she was beautiful? Sure, he said it everyday, but still… it made her happy hear (read) it again.

_Messer Padfoot would like to inquire what beauty has to do with anything in this situation, though he does agree that Miss Evens is much too clever for her own good. Messer Padfoot would also like to add that Mrs. Norris is NOT a cat, but a demon in disguise._

Lily found herself giggling at the parchment.

_Messer Wormtail agrees with Messer Padfoot on both counts and would like to add that Mrs. Norris looks like a dead sewer rat in a toupee. On behalf of all of the Marauders, Messer Wormtail bids Miss Evens a good day, and implores her to give Messer Prongs a chance. He deserves it._

And with that, the words faded away, leaving a slightly crumpled 'spare bit of parchment.'

Potter cleared his throat.

Lily started slightly, and then handed Potter the parchment, which he took gratefully and stowed in his pocket.

"Thanks."

Lily shrugged, and then smiled shyly at Potter. "That… that was an impressive piece of magic. How does it work?"

Potter looked surprised at the praise, but then smiled cockily. "A magician _never_ reveals his secrets."

Lily bit her lip. "Maybe… maybe you could teach me sometime… and then we could both be magicians together?"

Potter smiled and nodded so eagerly that he looked like a bobble head. "Yeah! Yeah, that'd be great!"

"Okay." Lily smiled at Potter before walking away. "See you later, James!"

As she walked, Lily thought about what Remus had said earlier. Sometimes, just sometimes, you needed to let yourself be impressed, and live.

**Yesterday, when I was on the train with my friend, I saw a guy who looked EXCACTLY like how I picture the teenage Remus Lupin to look. So I went up to him and asked him to write 'Remus J. Lupin' on my notebook. He did and it was wonderful, and then I left my notebook on the train…. *facepalm*. I feel like such an idiot… not only did I lose "Remus Lupin's" autograph, I also lost two weeks worth of Chemistry notes… Well, that little story had absolutely **_**nothing**_** to do with this fic. So… yeah.**

**PLEASE REVIEW!**


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